13 Feb
Last night I skipped the Grammys for my weekly Movie Night. There we watched Midnight In Paris and I managed to feel the sort of high-brow joy that makes me happy. Meanwhile an army of young Tweeters were rattling the collective cage of indie fans and people with a respect for classic rock alike. (more…)
6 Feb
Guys, have you heard it’s half time in America?! This is good news as for most of us as we were already accepting that it was not only the fourth quarter for America but for the entirety of the planet. Everything changed yesterday though, you see we had asked ourselves “If we can’t trust the Mayans who can we trust?” Luckily an advertisement reminded us of the obvious answer to that question, Clint Eastwood. (more…)
2 Feb
“….and it’s always February 2nd, and there’s nothing I can do about it!”
Good news for all those into the idea of celebrating made-up holidays like Flag Day or Chanukkah. Today is February 2nd, which means it’s Groundhog Day, that special day on the calendar where the national media focuses in on an over-sized rat in an irrelevant town in Pennsylvania. Anyone who graduated from kindergarten knows the deal; if the groundhog sees his shadow, we have six more weeks of winter, and if he doesn’t, spring blooms pre-March and Al Gore makes another documentary. It’s all there in L. Ron Hubbard’s Scientology: A New Slant On Life.
In case my sarcastic-enthusiasm isn’t coming off strong enough, let me reiterate; Groundhog Day is Dumb, and anyone who actually believes a beaver-wannabe named Punxsutawney Phil (a drug-dealer nickname if there ever was one) can predict the weather probably should have been beaten publicly by a sex-starved nun a long time ago. The only true reason to celebrate this fictional holiday is that Comedy Central will usually just put Bill Murray’s Groundhog Day on repeat.
(Side Note: Has there ever been a ska-punk rock band named the Punksutawney Phil’s? If not, I shot it. Also, shoot me an e-mail if you want to join my new ska-punk band.)
24 Jan
Hey guys! It’s Oscar nomination day and you know what that means! Complaining! (more…)
17 Jan
If you like comedy there is a show on my local cable access station that you simply must see. The Staten Island Comedy Show is a program put together by a slough of borderline mental patients. It plays on Staten Island and Manhattan cable access and it will blow your mind. (more…)
16 Jan
If you don’t know who Peter Dinklage is and why he won an award at the Golden Globes last night, then that means you haven’t watched “Game of Thrones” on HBO. (more…)
9 Jan
I am a snob. Just last week I nearly got into a fist fight with my little brother because I rolled my eyes at something he was excited about. This can be a real problem but when it comes to culture it means that I like way better shit than you. Of course there are ways that you can fake your way into cultural snobbery. One easy tip I can offer is checking out the films of the Criterion Collection. (more…)
5 Dec
Last night TLC added another name to a long list of programs it produces that simultaneously celebrate and mock conservative values (Sister Wives, 19 Kids and Counting, A Conception Story) with the premier of The Virgin Diaries.
The Virgin Dairies follows different virgins (some are virgins for religious reasons, other because they are awkward) as they quest to lose their V cards. The first of these virgins are Christian couple Shanna and Ryan who are saving their first kiss for their wedding day and their first sexual encounter for their wedding night. Their wedding kiss alone is enough to make most people squirm and does not bode well for their first night (not to ruin the surprise but it is also disastrous). The parents look on in horror wondering why they were the ones stuck with the 30 year old virgins for kids.
8 Nov
Over the past few decades many people have lamented the “sell out” status of the Rolling Stones. Corporate sponsorship for their tours, playing the same songs in increasingly vacuous terrain, $200 concert tickets, you know the deal. Funny thing is those young rebels were ready to sell out long ago. (more…)
After a month long recess America’s favorite pseudo-reality show is finally coming back on the air. Tomorrow marks the first Republican Primary debate since the Santorum upsets in Minnesota, Colorado and Missouri. A good debate showing by Santorum here could clinch a victory in Michigan and Ohio which would give him a serious leg up [...]
Today would have been the 45th birthday of Kurt Cobain. The pitfalls of rock stardom often lead to young deaths and so the game of fan-fiction of what might have been is often very kind to the likes of Cobain and his ilk. The reality though is usually much less pleasant. In fact, it is [...]
The much hated and despised by everyone Westboro Baptist Church have plans to picket the private funeral of Whitney Houston because they apparently ran out of homosexuals, Catholics, Jews, and African Americans to hate. If you ever want to get yourself worked up or just have a laugh at extreme racism, check out their website or Wikipedia page.
This week I haven’t felt particularly entertained. There weren’t as many sharable internet gags. I feel let down. People of the internet, you have let me down! Where are the 80s accordion songs? Where are all of the amusing yet short lived internet memes? Where were all the cats!? Sometimes I feel like the internet has failed [...]
Presidents Day is right around the corner and I’m sure some, if not most, of you will be having a long weekend relaxing, hanging out, and maybe sipping on a few cold ones. Since that day has significance to the American people, why not take time to read some interesting facts about Abraham Lincoln, the [...]
